I grew up being told all of the things that I couldn’t do. I guess that’s what limitation does to people. It kills individual dreams as well as stymies the hope and possibility of generations to come. Lack and want can definitely be a distraction to fulfilling purpose – destiny. It beats you down to the point where you can’t see past your circumstances. The only tangible thing to look forward to is the next meal. I’ve known since I was twelve years old, that I was called to ministry. At that time Joyce Meyer, Beth Moore, Juanita Bynum and the like were still in obscurity. I imagine they were somewhere in a fight for their lives; desperately trying to hold on to the dream God had placed in their hearts. Women didn’t minister, they were missionaries. It’s hard to believe that in year 2014, there are still some folks who still believe that women should be relegated to certain roles in society. Usually those that don’t usurp authority over men and are without any personal power or financial independence.
The Book says that in order to find my life, I must be willing to lose it. I’ve finally lived long enough to understand the meaning of that verse. The simple fact is that I can’t do life successfully, unless I’m working with God’s plan. In His will for my life. I’ve tried my plan every way I can think of, it never works. I always end up in a place that I’d never thought I’d be. When I think about one more trip, aimlessly wandering around the mountain I created; or the unbearable heat – the parchedness of my desert, I shudder. I get clear, focus, right away. Those seasons in my life were just that bad. Eventually, I always ended up back at square one. The same choice being repeated – my way or His? So now, the work is bringing God’s plan into sharp focus. To do that, there’s a lot of unlearning that is happening. A lot of perceptions and mindsets that I’ve acquired over the span of my life that are incorrect, self- defeating. They have been the giants in my life that have made accomplishing the mission virtually impossible. Probably because I didn’t put them in their proper place. I put them first. I could never quite find enough time to devote to the things I knew God had asked me to do.
To gain clear focus and put my life in perspective; I had to go through a radical process of elimination. I completed all projects previously committed to. I cancelled all projects that were pending, that didn’t line up with the vision that God has given me. I postponed the projects that I know are God’s will, but out of His timing. The most important thing before me now, is to focus on getting my soul realigned with my spirit. Getting right with God. I need to be operating from a place of true spiritual empowerment. A place that God can work effectively through me. My singular focus is doing the necessary to execute the plan as prescribed. I’ve fallen headlong into its fire and have been set ablaze by God’s consuming passion. After many a year of patient wooing, God has finally won my heart.