I talk to people all of the time. However, it is a rare occasion indeed, that I have the pleasure of engaging in meaningful conversation. Over the past semester, I met a new friend who had an interest in filmmaking. Since this is my thing, I asked her if she’d like to come to the Lunafest Film Festival with me. To my surprise, I actually met someone who talks as much or more than I do. From the moment we began the drive we talked non-stop. We arrived an hour early. The reception hadn’t begun, however everything was all set up. The Festival sponsors welcomed us in. They gave us their pitch for and received an additional donation from each of for the cause the Festival supported. We were set up with scrumptious hors d’oeuvres. We then settled onto a leaning post where our conversation continued. We were so immersed in conversation that we didn’t notice the other three hundred and ninety-eight film goers enter the room. The only time that there was a lull in the conversation, was during the film series. Afterwards, we talked the entire fifty miles back to my house; and then sat outside another hour. Whew! Boy was I tired. That was a personal record for me. All total, we shared about eight hours of EFFORTLESS conversation. It just happened, flowed naturally.
My conversations with God, have not been as easy or engaging. At least not for Him. More or less, I’ve done all the talking. Rambling on and on. Talking at Him not to Him with no interval. He hasn’t been able to get a word in edgewise. To make matters worse, when I’m done I get up without excusing myself and just leave. Wow! If I was on the receiving end of that, I would think how rude! The embarrassing part of this for me, is that I’m breaking all of the rules of conversation that I’m trying to teach my eight year old son. It’s hard for my son to remember that an essential part of good conversation is listening. You hear with ears; but listen with your heart.
What I’ve found most amazing about this Soul Fast is that I intuitively find myself at the next junction, even before I know where it is. Each night after my son has been put to bed, I sit alone in the quiet of the night. There’s not much residue of the day left in my thoughts. This process has helped me to detach a great measure from the overwhelming amount of information that I was bombarded with online. As I sit with myself in the darkness, I’m uncomfortable in the silence. I guess that I’m waiting for God to break through it with rants that resemble my own. He hasn’t done that. He’s been quiet; waiting to see I suppose, that He has my undivided attention. Am I’m really listening? Perhaps after all of these years of being the other half of a virtually one-sided conversation He’s at a loss of where to begin. I can’t imagine what I’ve missed all of these many years. Listening for God’s still small voice is the only way to RECEIVE His impartation to me of divine wisdom and knowledge. Thus far, I haven’t heard anything. On this seventeen day, I’m actively listening; however, I’m unsure how long He’ll make me wait before He speaks to me.